By Danny Maybin
As I sailed into Skagway where the mountains meet the sea
I came upon a lonely hotel that had the essential three
A bed, a bath and a bar
These were all I needed
So I signed my name, threw my clothes in the room
And to the bar retreated
Cold porter and hot salmon stew was the special on the bill
The salmon stew soon was gone but she kept my flagon filled
Then wanderlust came over me as I looked out on the bay
So I paid my bill, tipped heavily
And rose with a mighty sway
Out into the Alaskan night, this explorer strode with purpose
And raised my hand to hail a cab
Which made the locals nervous
“There are no taxis here,” said one, “you’ll have to use your feet
And if you intend on seeing our town, there’s a park just
down the street.”
And so I sallied forth as a conqueror bent upon a quest
Only stopping at one more pub to take a much needed rest
It was there I learned of a stream, just as it was getting dark
Completely filled with salmon that flowed down by the park
“This stream I must see,” said I
As I bought another round for the crowd
And I thought to myself as I strode down the street
Their laughter seems awfully loud
When I reached the stream I realized that they hadn’t lied one bit
For a cat could cross from one side to the other
Without getting his little feet wet
Having no rod or reel with which a fish I could land
I felt it my solemn duty to at least catch one by hand
As I sat on the bank thinking like I was sitting on a boat
I discovered a bottle of porter in the pocket of my coat
I quickly dispatched the porter and waded out among the fish
To catch a single salmon was all that I had wished
With a belly full of porter and a rear end like a thimble
As I leaned over to grab a fish, my knees began to tremble
To keep from falling forward, I then began to run
But gravity overtook me and my flailing helped me none
Face first is how I landed in that cold Alaska stream
And when I came up and caught my breath
Skagway heard me scream
There, upon my hands and knees trying to catch my breath
A salmon lodged against me, reeking of three days death
My investment in the porter and all that hot salmon stew
Was quickly then divested on the local game warden’s shoes
Apparently he had watched me in my struggle and my plight
And had called ahead and secured for me a place to spend the night.
The last thing I remember while clambering up the bank
Was a blinding flash and a merciless “thump”
And into sleep I sank
I’ll spare you the rest of my story
Just know I made it back home
And I’ll offer you bits of wisdom
If ever to Skagway you roam
Have your fill of the porter
Respect the game warden’s shoes
Linger not in the park long after dark
And lay off of that ole salmon stew!
Danny Maybin’s family have fished and hunted in the area of Lake Summit for at least six generations. He is a state firearms instructor a blacksmith, musician/luthier, and his favorite, a fishin’ and hunting resort facilitator. He also does voice acting, copywriting, and short story humor.